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Sly0712

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About Sly0712

  • Birthday December 29

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  1. Sly0712

    I need a logline critique - A man confronts mistakes of his past when his son goes missiong 3 hours before a nuclear bomb drops on his city... Does it make you curious?

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. lauriestark

      lauriestark

      It makes me somewhat curious. What would push it over the edge to SUPER interesting would be some ironic twist or some fact about the man that makes him sound like he would be uniquely challenged by this situation (more so even than the average person).

    3. adlocke

      adlocke

      "a man confronts mistakes of his past" lost me. the rest was good. i wouldn't fill my friend in with what i quoted in the previous sentence, but i would with the other half of the logline.

    4. Sly0712

      Sly0712

      Awesome stuff guys. For specificity, he is in witness protection program and returns to the city just to get his son to the safety bunker the government setup for him. But then word spreads of his return leading to a lot of fuckery. Should I state the fact that he is a snitch/in witsec or would that be best left out?

    5. Show next comments  9 more
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